How to Overcome Failure
Posted January 12th, 2015
At one time or another, we all encounter failure. It can be tough to bear. But our ultimate success depends primarily on how we deal with failure, our resilience in overcoming failure.
One way to help our recovery from failure is to understand how it affects us psychologically, how it influences our attitude and mindset.
1. It makes goals seem harder, and our ability seem weaker.
When we fail to achieve a goal, it appears tougher to us than it really is. In actuality, achieving the goal is no more arduous than it was; it is just our perception of it that has changed. We have to guard against this kind of thinking. The goal hasn’t changed, we have.
When we fail, we also begin to perceive ourselves differently. We perceive our abilities as being less developed than they may actually be. Even though we have failed, we ourselves have not changed. Our abilities are still the same. So, again, we need to avoid this kind of negative thinking.
2. We become more risk averse
Consciously or not, failure can affect our appetite for taking on new challenges. We become fearful of failing again, whether we are willing to admit it to ourselves or not. This has marked effects on our performance. We are more concerned about not failing, rather than succeeding. We focus on not making mistakes, rather than giving our best performance. We take a more defensive, rather than offensive posture. We begin to put increased pressure on ourselves, which can lead to a failure to perform. One way to handle this increased pressure, and prevent ourselves from choking, is to hum or whistle, which redirects our attention and keeps us from thinking too much.
To deal with failure, you need to be aware of the condition of your willpower. Like any of your muscles, it can become fatigued, and it needs proper nutrition to function. You need to take breaks occasionally. You cannot perform your best without them. We can focus intensely for only about an hour. That is all that our brains are capable of. So, after an hour, our bodies need some time to rest and recover. Our willpower also requires glucose, which we get through our food. So, actually eating something sweet may help you to persevere longer in a task.
The good news about willpower is that it appears to be a renewable resource. Some studies claimed that it is a limited resource, that it eventually runs out. But other studies have shown this is not the case, that if we believe we have the willpower, we tend to persevere.
To improve our mindset when dealing with failure, psychologists recommend that after experiencing failure at a certain task, break that task down into the things that you can do something about, and things that you cannot. Figure out how to bring those things you have no power over under your control, forexample, by adding to your skill set,taking classes, or gaining new knowledge. Then focus on the things you can control.
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